Dissonant Stars (First Part)

 I

"Hello Mami, Sir Pie, I would like to request to work at home tonight.  My sister and her family are out of town and my mom is not feeling well. Rest assured that my Broadband Internet can handle the account supervision. Upon your approval, I will inform the team immediately..."

I was told not to panic in the face of her revelation.  But when the dreaded words bounced off her lips, it took merely minutes for terror to assemble. There are no conclusive evidence yet, but when she felt a stinging pain at the wrong places of her body,  it was easy to buy the readily assumptions

and scare us. 

Beneath  the poised discernment is a state of trepidation.  She fears a trip to a specialist, and prefers the solace, saints peddled.  She's not ready to hear the truth - one that puts mortality in doubt. I wish there is some other way aside from embracing denial, but if the symptoms continue, we have to tell the favorite aunt, at once.

Comfort takes in the form of frequent trips to the master's bedroom to give her extra attention.  Twice I caught her inspecting some semi-precious stones. She plans to sell a few to clear some space in her jewelry box. She also began contemplating making peace with her enemies, if she has one. We try not to talk about the issue beforehand, but I know, both of us must come into terms of the things that lie ahead.

I'm crumbling and that's the truth.

But like her, I too would prefer seeking comfort from the almighty before giving in to the intervention of science.

That afternoon, I accompanied her to hear the mass after many months of absence.

II

"Hetong damit na suot ko binili ko lang sa ukay-ukay.  Itong palda ko, 40 pesos, etong blouse ko 35. Pero sila kapag may pera, lumabalas ng hindi ako kasama. Nung may sakit ako, ni singko, hindi man lang sila bumili ng gamot para sa akin.  

Sawa na ako sa buhay ko."

Let he who is without sin cast the first stone.

I  was among the thousands who have seen on TV how Nanay Lourdes suffered blows in the hands of her own children.  My head was bursting with ideas on how to get even with the evil couple. I was thinking of hurling molotov cocktail at their residence, or even plastering shaming notices at their gate.  Heck, I even went to the couple's apartment in Mandaluyong  just to see the after effects of being exposed in public.

All for this belief that it would never happen to us. 

The whole time I set my sights elsewhere, something shitty was happening close to home. We always knew my cousin (from the father's side) beats up his mother. My aunt used to count the blue marks on her body when retelling the fistful episodes during phone conversations with my mom.

We thought the habit had ceased when he became a dad. But when cash doles from his TNT father began to dry up and interrupt their already hand-to-mouth subsistence, and his two very young kids could hardly afford a decent meal because the family has no money, the nasty periods returned with a vengeance.

This time dragging my niece and nephew into the pit.

-tobecontinued-