Orbiter

Opening my friendster account this evening, I discovered something hidden inside my testimonial folder which put a smile on my weary face.

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Jay (panks) is a gift to my life simply because in him I saw the real world which seemed to be vague. I can proudly say that this GUY is really a man of good heart, a responsible man and a very LOYAL and THOUGHTFUL person I'd ever known...

Thanks for the good times and bad times we've shared. For many years now, I realized that no one can ever replace the things you've done to me... Thanks for the unwavering support, love and encouragement that you gave me. All those things I owe it from you...Through the test of time, you're still the same person and I'm so grateful for that...

Take gud care of yourself and I know you can possibly reach all your goals in life..I'm just here for you, ready to listen and ready to be leaned on...mwah!

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After reading his testimonial over and over again, I've realized that despite the near break-ups and major fights we have waged against one another, we remain together as companions and friends in our same-sex relationship. Looking back at our beginnings, our meet-up was purely accidental. He came into my life at a time when I was desperately trying to detoxify myself from a hang-over of a previous relationship. My arrival into his life opened the reality of finding passion and intimacy he was seeking during those younger days.

Three years, five months and untracked days later, our story keeps on writing despite the odds that continue to threaten us. The fact that we have lasted this long prevents us from having thoughts of total and complete disconnection anymore. Surpassing the realm of the "self," we have found a comfortable existence in "us." I for one admit, that despite my strong inclinations and past attempts to reclaim my own freedom when things get extremely rough, I am fully aware that such independence would just be short lived. Same thing is true with him.

Phanks' testimonial proves that my thoughts were all wrong. Somehow he sees my efforts and values everything I have done to him. The message, which he subtely told me by implying something about my friendster squarely contradicts my popular and darkstar-ish belief that I am alone.

At a time when complex galaxies fall around me, he gave me a little assurance that I still have a planet to orbit.

Phanks is still my world.