Monday, March 21, 2011

How To Set Up A Blind Date

Playing matchmaker has been a spare-time activity I embraced  with much zeal to aid friends in search of love.  Once I was a wing man  to a  tropa who courted his pretty classmate back in college. 

They became lovers after a year of constant dating.  

The same calling led me to help a college tropa deliver a box of Ferrero Rocher when he wooed a chick he met during  a career seminar four years ago.  

They too became lovers after going out for several months.  

Both  these couples tied the knot last year.  I  was the best man in one of  the weddings while the college tropa asked me to become a groomsman in his nuptial.  

Aware of my successes, I  would  have pursued my pastime to cover up for my blessed singleness. But the embarrassing setbacks in the gay world lead me to believe that my luck had just ran out. Meanwhile,  my  attempt to set up Miyaw-Miyaw  (the ex-gymbuddy/de-facto boytoy) with a chick didn't even make past the texting stage. After the failed attempt, I stopped matchmaking  people out of fear that it does more harm than good to love seekers.

So imagine my  reluctance when I said yes to a chick friend from college.  She would  leave private messages on Facebook reminding me of an  old promise of introducing him to a guy.  (Hello!!  I don't deal with straight guys gurl!)  

Another friend who was  shoving  his Ford Fiesta down my throat seems in need of a real girl to distract him too. Nearing his 30s, his mom had asked us to find him a date when the college tropa got married last year. However, with our friend showing softness only a feminine guy would  reveal, girls leave him for someone else.  Fiesta boy would then move on by posting pictures of him with female celebrities.

Introducing  them to one another might put a stop to my annoyance, and perhaps, even an end to a lifelong searching. But  before a blind date could  take place, preparations must be undertaken to make sure both girl and boy get each others attention.

How To Set Up A Blind Date

1.  Choose a deserving candidate. In  my case I will be playing matchmaker to straight friends.  Both have no experience being in a romantic relationship.  

2.   The candidates are my friends from the university. No prior contact exists between the two.  However, since common friends abound, both claims each other's acquaintances.

3.   To discourage the two from checking each other on Facebook and other social media applications, the candidates will be given names other than their own.  This would also raise the thrill factor of the blind date since the discovery of common friends and histories might - prematurely -  spoil the fun.

4.  Scrapbook questions will be thrown to both candidates.  During the first phase of the blind date, all means of contact must pass through the moderator.

Another  idea would be to let each candidate throw questions to their blind date. Inquiries that require delayed revelation include the following:

  • Batch
  • Major
  • Section
  • Common friends in the university.

5.  Knowledge of the planned blind date must never get out among the three of us. Common friends might not approve of such idea.

6.   After a week of getting to know each other, both  candidates would be asked if they wish to trade numbers or email addresses. From there, the mediator would have to pull back and observe everything from a distance.

7.   Another  idea would be to arrange a friendly meet-up for the candidates.  Depending on the agreement, mediator presence might be required.

So there. I do not know if the plan would work, or my own idea of a blind date will do wonders for these first - time lovers. Should I succeed in making them agree to a meeting, I would follow the step by step procedure and arrange a blind date for my single non-straight friends.

The couples I helped before knew each other before I stepped in.  Attraction was there and so was the chemistry. What was lacking was support. A little push, a sprinkle of encouragement, a cheerleader behind the scene and off they go courting and declaring their love for each other. Pairing  two people who don't know the other entails a lot of risks. 

There's always the aesthetic expectation to contend with.

To be honest, the blind date has selfish reasons.  One is to make Fiesta  Boy realize that he should be better off revealing his true colors.  Meanwhile, I could introduce my college chick to another guy.  But her repeated inquiry and my lack of connections with straight guys leave me no choice but to match her with someone readily available.

I've been showered with love and affection in many ways my cynic self  would never believe.  Stepping up to make this little venture work gives back a little of what I have received.. If it means ridding the world of two less lonely people, then by all means, the blind date should be supported.  No matter how silly and (possibly hopeless) the idea is.  There's no harm in trying.  

Love works in mysterious ways.


Anonymous said...

praying that the two would agree for a meeting, so that sir joms could help and arrange one for me as well.



canonista said...

I too became a matchmaker myself. :-)

1 straight couple lasted 2 years when I introduced them to each other.

1 gay couple lasted for 3 years when I introduced them both.

1 other gay couple are running at their 2nd year.

I don't arrange blind dates 'though, I just introduce them to each other, whomever I think is compatible for each other.

~Carrie~ said...

all the best, Mugen :) You came up with really good steps to atch making in blind dates. I liked the one where they must not check out each other's social network accounts. Dun kasi nasisira minsan yung suspense and thrill.

hard2getxxx said...

yung isang friend ko naging successful yung matchmaking niya.

and the couple got married and had children. pero after many years sinisi ng wife si friend kung bakit napangasawa niya ang husband niya

Louie said...

Me likes the #3 step. Para nga naman hindi mabuild ang first impression sa online accounts agad.

These are very great steps. Good luck. =)

Spiral Prince said...


Mu[g]en said...

Spiral Prince:

Of course! Naghahanap ako ng pagkakaabalahan eh. Hehehe.


Hope it works, I have vested interest in their friendship.


Bakit naman sinisisi? Nagbago ba ng ugali yung friend mo?

Mu[g]en said...


Thanks! I'm not really close to Fiesta Boy, but I know that his gentle personality, godliness and good family values deserve to be shared.


Naks, magaling ka pala mag profiling!


Start searching while you still have time (and ideals) When you grow older, those ideals will be tarnished by the reality of the lives around us.

deus_ex_machina said...

This is a rather interesting post. Reminds me of a cool show, Millionaire Matchmaker.

The matchmaker, Patti, also follows guidelines in fixing a perfect date up. Oh yeah, according to her, no sex on the first date no matter how physically attracted you are to each other, and at any other time until you're in a committed, exclusive, monogamous relationship.

Like Louie, I like step #3, it somehow keeps the integrity of the essence of a "blind" date. Good luck! :)

Mu[g]en said...

Deus Ex Machina

I'm sure the one's I'd be pairing will abide such rules. Pareho silang conservative. Kaya nga NBSB/NGSB sila eh.

Thanks for dropping by. Sana, I could look back at this entry and write how this little venture changed people's lives.

Desperate Houseboy said...

Papa Mugs, baka naman me talab pa yung pagiging match maker mo eh sampolan mo ulit sa akin. Baka umepek. :)

Bigay ko sa yo profile ko. hehehe

Mr. G said...

Interesting! I had my fair share of being a matchmaker among friends and acquaintances, but then, minsan it is too stressfull. So bahala na lang sila sa buhay nila...

Yj said...

pero hindi mawala sa isip ko habang binabasa ko ito..

yung dalawang beks na pinag meet mo sa isang lrt station... lol

Spiral Prince said...

Remind me to enlist for Mugen Matchmaking Inc. in the future! ;)

red the mod said...

To loosely quote Boys' Night Out: Spread the love.

The objective is sincere, albeit benevolent, but it entails the prerequisite that you know both parties with depth, thus arming you with the proper valuation of possible compatibilities or otherwise.

The system seems sound enough, and pliant enough, to be efficacious both ways. I just wonder if one or both parties have a complicated character? Let's face it, some people are just, without meaning any expletive intent, difficult.

I wish you not luck but fortitude, empathy, and presence of mind in your matchmaking endeavors. It would be nice to someday look back and be able to say you've helped that relationship blossom, if only as a catalytic precursor.


Mu[g]en said...


Mukhang nga akong papalpak eh. Nag-iinarte si Lalaki. Leche, pag hindi niya to sineryoso, pagkakalat kong lalaki ang hanap niya.


Nakakarelate ako! Medyo stress nga ang magmatchmaking. Huhuhu.


At dahil diyan, irerepost ko siya one of these days. Hahaha! Ang kupal ko lang no?

Mu[g]en said...

Spiral Prince:

I think my business will fold up even before it begins soaring. Hahaha.

But you are, interesting. Lot of people around here are curious about you.


To see friend with a partner. A guy, we saw for the longest time as hopeless attending our annual reunion with his beau - who is also my friend, would atone me for taking a different route far from what my straight friends had envisioned.

red the mod said...

But why the need to atone? Is it not our birthright to seek the brand of happiness that's endemic to us? Why do I sense guilt when no wrong has been done?

Kiks said...

nakow, we have so many things to talk about when i go visit. i did the same thing to a friend and ayun, they have two children na. how i wish ako na sana ang inanakan. LOL

love does work in mysterious ways...

Mu[g]en said...


It's because for the longest time, I hid my sexuality from them. I let others know about me first before the revelation came to their shores.

Though they don't look down on me because of my sexuality, they prefer I'd be the last, to come out.


At mukhang gwapo yung pinag-match mo ah! Hahaha!! :)

gauxves said...

hi joms, i was set up for a blind date last month, but he didn't show up... guess he wasn't interested... #theregoesmyinsecurity

Spiral Prince said...

You'll never know until you try! :P You can give services depending on the season, see: summer dates, Halloween dates, Christmas dates, graduation dates, valentines dates, etc. The possibilities are seemingly endless!

And really, now, curiosity will only get one so far. :3 I just got reminded earlier today by someone about the quote, "familiarity breeds contempt." given my OC tendencies, I'm a contempt catalyst. :))