Values Education

Guy:  Hello
Me:   Hi
Guy:  Can we be friends?

I hold on to the belief that friendship - in its sincerest sense - is nurtured. It must have a foundation, like common interests, shared struggles or at least two people, who are friends, co-habitate a common space. Embracing this philosophy, I consider those I follow on Social Networks friends, if not acquaintances. Ties exists and it's not important to spell it out for all to see.

For this reason, I found it strange when some guy from Twitter, who followed me just recently, asked if we could be friends. Motives aside, (years of experience honed me to read the tell-tale signs) I found the question very perplexing. 

I would have responded in a hostile tone, if not for my partner's reminder - a long time ago - to be nice to everyone. Modesty aside, the change of display image some days ago sent hawks circling above my head. It didn't bother me, and I took their interests as a complement. However, what happened next between me and the guy affirms his penchant for things that are fleeting. 

Or should I regard his social values inferior to mine?

Me:  Sure, walang problema. =)
Guy: Great! Puwede malaman ang number mo? Salamat?

Of the things I find very difficult to give is my phone number. Siguro dahil I hardly send SMS or respond to messages. It annoys me too when people engage me in small talk over text instead of going directly to the point. And to spare these people from my diabolic pet peeve, I'd rather not give my number unless, it is something of great importance and immediate urgency.

I tried to make light of his reasons, especially when I know nothing which connects us. Perhaps my values are obsolete, and that, people these days do indeed embrace the fleeting and the shallow. I wouldn't mind putting into words my hand of friendship, but asking my number is a breach of etiquette.

It's a direct assault of personal space.

Me:  How old are you pare

Guy: 27 po. 

Guy: Kayo?

Me:  19

Guy: Hahay... Ang bata pa pala. -D So puwede ko ba malaman number mo?

Me:  Why ask my number?

Guy: So I can call you?

Me:  I'm not satisfied with your answer. Make it all clear to me.

Guy: I want us to be friends. And to make that happen, mas magiging okay kung may voiced communication din. :D

Guy: Mas ok and voiced communication kesa Twitter.

Me:  Nasusukat ba ang pagkakaibigan sa pagrinig ng boses ng isa't isa?

I would have said a mouthful and give the guy some tips on finding real friendship. But if this is how most people behave online; of how ties are forged without any profound respect for time and familiarity. If I'd only let my old self speak and say, "DP lang yan parekoy." Then there's no point in raising a voice.

Instead, I would leave this entry for others to find, and hopefully, what we cherish as an older generation rubs off to those we will one day leave behind.