Sunday, September 23, 2012

Kind and Generous

I can be very nice to people.

Despite my tendency to be aloof, I can be very accommodating to those who see beyond the impression. I can bend rules if reasons justify. And I can be very patient, when it comes to loved ones, to colleagues, or to fellow travelers who got heavy burdens to carry on their back.

I try to be considerate and non-confrontational. I won't raise issues and shake establishments just to keep the peace. And I won't demand things I cannot do myself. Selflessness begins when one realizes his limitations.

But this generosity of spirit appears to be working against me. People tend to abuse it knowing you won't howl. Disarmed, protestations usually fall on deaf ears. Unforgotten. I always pay attention to what has happened in the past. I run my hand and feel my scars so that others won't have to suffer the atrocities I've been through.

I guess the world doesn't work that way. Whoever said that when you give a hand, your arms would be pulled apart must have been through such epiphany. 

I've been wondering if the world has enough of my good side. The peaceful, good-vibes, and stress-free me? Should I finally make adjustments on how I see the universe so that those who have basked under my graces know and feel that I am actually a troublesome ass to reckon with?