For The Yaya Sisterhood

How do you find happiness:

When you exert an effort just to make a phonecall to your lover, only to ignore it and make an excuse that he's so very busy that he even can't place a miss call during his lunch break.

When you feel that you're being used. That your lover doesn't appreciate you or your efforts and all those things he have said seemed to be superficial - that it begins to appear that they were uttered just to appease your feelings.

When you realize that it was you who tries to hold on; that it was you who tries to make it work despite the rifts that are beginning to separate you from him.

When you feel that everything he does for you becomes conditional.

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I once posted an advise in Pinoyexchange about a guy who had issues about his uncaring and unappreciative boyfriend.

I told him that he should think about himself first before he waste his life to his lover - who doesn't seem to realize the sacrifices his buddy is giving to him.

I told him to do everything in his capacity to make himself feel better; That he would have a life beyond the borders of his lover's.

Because at least, his freedom would have been mine. In his possible actions, I might feel my own liberation.

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But enough is enough.

I have known to strike back when I feel pain, I have been a fighter and I will always be one.

Like what I've said,

When Phanks doesn't see me.

Others might will.

In my quest to make myself feel better.

To make myself feel needed, even just for a little while.






This afternoon, I decided to strike back.