Wednesday, November 14, 2012

Collateral Damage (Second Part)

Previously on Souljacker

The intense glow of city lights faded as the night passed into daylight. But the early morning lull didn't stop me and the boy from learning the lives we lead behind the skin full and teasing profiles on Romeo's world.

He was five years my junior. An only child, who pursued another shot at the academe to chase his dream of becoming a doctor. Wounded, he too was a returning pupil on Romeo's world.

The boy asked the reason for my existence. I truthfully answered that I don't know what I'm doing on the planet. Sure, I was horny. To a point maybe, I was inflating my ego. But I guess I'm as lost as the last time HavokSSR made planet fall.

"It's either I had the drill." I wrote. "That the pain and the memory will linger for another three months." He knew I just came from a break-up.

"Or puwede rin naman siguro na mawala ako dahil nakaya ko pa rin mag-intay at magtino." It was the first time I showed a hint of humanity after provoking so many men to bite my bait.

Between sharing our personal legends, were the naughty interludes, which kept our boners stiff. Twice, I asked if he would like to get off by juvenile means. Said he doesn't do phone sex, and preferred having the real thing.

It would have been amazing to see who blinks first, as no one likes to offer his place.

"May mga tao dito... sa inyo na lang." I said.

"Kung puwede nga lang. Kaso sa dorm ako nakatira." His lack of cooperation leaves us back to telling each other more stories.

Looking back, had he offered his place, I do not know if I will accept his invitation or not. It was far easier to sneak out than let another person into my home. But in doing so, I would have lost my wager and would have walked out with a broken heart. For somewhere among the stars, maybe, someone else might be waiting for a change of heart.

It just so happened that I let the inner strife consume me.

And there's no way of going back had I chose to get burned.

As his frustrations grew, I was short of giving in to temptation. The scorpions had stung me for the second night and our lives won't wait for a chance to arrange another match. Knowing that work will keep me busy for the rest of the week, and the winds of change is as erratic as my state of mind, a plan has been hatched to get what we both want.

"You can always say that a friend got locked outside his dorm." I heard my bedroom voice speaking. It was just me and my mom and a couple of helpers left in the house.

"But you know, he will have to leave when the fun is over." God, why do I have to over-think when libog and emotions come in-between.

Listening to the voice of restraint, I gave my digits not for us to meet. But to talk some more and assure him that I'm real. Because even when we don't find ourselves in the same bed, and we manage to keep our ties intact even when the trash talk had already blurred the lines of friendship. At the end of the night, I wish to know another person.

Someone, whose point of view that might help me get along as my life stumbles into its new spot.

Receiving a text message to confirm that he got my number. I pressed the headset against my ears. Hearing his voice for the first time, we end up talking until sunrise.