Call Boy

I was about to hand over my bag to a waiting waiter when a guy sitting at a table outside O-Bar called my attention. Turning my head around, it was hard not to ignore the stranger. With a boyish face, lean built and a smile that would attract even the flesh peddlers of Orosa, I thought I hit the jackpot.

Getting back my bag, I decided to sit beside the guy to know him better.

"So what brings you here?" I asked. From the way he carried himself, he seemed to be a dayo of that place.

"Lonely I guess. And you?"

"I'm about to go clubbing when you called me."

"Where do you work?" My interrogation went on. I was digging the more essential details to have a clear picture of the person I am dealing with.

"At the moment, I'm looking for a job. But I used to work in a gay bar..." The mere mention of the word gay bar made me cringe.

Before I could throw in more questions, he suggested a more conducive place to talk.

"Tara lipat tayo sa Silya para makapagusap ng mas maayos." I hesitantly agreed to his suggestion.

Our first spot was a dark corner inside the videoke bar. I immediately knew what he was trying to convey. His mere mention of his previous job raised my guard, but I tried not to speculate his reason for calling me. Maybe he just wanted to talk. Perhaps, he needs a break from his business. After all, the flesh traders are suppose to know their market - rich effeminate guys who are drunk, wasted and awfully lonely. Include the chubby, well-dressed ones who grace Malate to show-off their new ensemble. I was walking alone, staggering towards the dance club after coming from another drinking spree. Instincts suggest that he might have thought I'd be an easy target. I could have been if history had not preceded our encounter. But he should have mastered the trade first, a manly guy wouldn't easily give in to a prostitute's bait.

"I hope I won't disappoint you, but the truth is, I'm looking for someone." His answer was point blank. Even I didn't expect his brutal frankness.

"Sorry dude but I don't pay..." His cheery mood suddenly turned sour. Who would have thought a good-looking guy like him would be declined. "Besides, why should I when I can get it for free?"

He explained his situation. He had a child to raise and its difficult to find a job.

"Marami pa kasing requirements gaya ng NBI at Police Clearance eh." I wanted to empathize with him, but compassion has no place in a dog-eat-dog world such as Malate. Everyone is just but a fair game.

"Alam mo dude ganito yan..." Before I could continue, he asked if I could spare him a San Mig Light. With no choice but to comply, I ordered beer for the two of us. "Naghahanap rin ako kagaya mo, ang kaibahan lang natin eh hindi ako nagbabayad at nagpapabayad sa nakaka-trip ko."

The conversation went around his reason for calling me and my arguments as to why I can't pick him. He said I got good built which he found enticing. He also said he does "both ways" and wondered if I'm packing a "big one" under my pants. I evaded his questions to deflect his attempts in seducing me.

"Kahit 300 na lang, gipit na gipit lang ako." The discount would have changed my mind if he could offer a private place.

"Marami akong alam na hotel sa paligid. P200 lang short time."

"Hindi ako pumapasok sa motel eh..." His suggestion conjured memories I don't want to remember. Not anymore.

I asked for the bill long before he was able to finish his bottle. No matter how we deny it, but we knew we're just wasting our time.

"Ikaw talaga ang gusto ko eh." He tried to resuscitate the transaction to hold off the looming silence.

"It won't work dude," I said to myself. "Use your charm on someone else."

"Alam mo pare, may hitsura ka naman eh. Marami diyan, mas malaki pa ibabayad sa iyo. Hindi mo na kailangan mag-offer ng discount gaya ng binibigay mo sa akin." I assured. "Besides, bata pa ako. Saka na ako hahanap ng katulad mo pag hindi ko na kaya maka-score ng libre."

Again, another moment of silence. I suddenly remembered that big fat lousy-looking kid who would go to BED to dance and watch the Gogo Boys show their pumped-up chests on the ledge.

"Okay lang kahit iwanan mo na ako... Gagawin kong pang-display tong bote ng beer." This time we moved to another table. A spot where he could see everyone passing along the gay street of Nakpil.

"Sigurado ka tol?" I asked.

"Oo."

"Sige, basta sabihin mo na lang sa waiter na nakita ako ng bf ko kaya iniwan kita. Yoko naman isipin nila na inatrasan kita." Hope my straight words were not that cruel.

I left him at the table. Searching for his new prospect.

-

Long before the gym days, I used to pay men for affection. Masseurs abound and they would do extra for a price. P1,000, 500 - there were many conditions set before the performance. Some would demand that there would be no kissing. Others are for jack-off only. Sometimes you have to pay more to do more. Others would just lie down and let you do everything to them. In the end, you know its just a mechanical activity. There were virtually no human contact - a thing I would die for especially with the unrequited love I was receiving. I did it a couple of times behind the ex-boyfriend's back until I realized there was no end to it.

It was no power trip or revenge. It was pity.

I turned down the extra service the last time I sought a masseur. It was the masseur's call and I wouldn't drop hints until he offered the sex for free. The gamble paid off and I got more from the pre-bargain. The next time I showed my naked pictures on the chatroom, it was the others' turn to ask whether I am for hire or not.

-

So I went inside the club a little shaken after the encounter. The callboy's presence not only brought back memories, it also raises doubts as to whether intimacy is something I could still get for free. Save for the unlamented memento from Planet Romeo, I was virtually sexless these past few months.

And so I did the unexpected and pursued the guy of my liking. He was receptive of course for I figured that it takes a little game of seduction to break walls between people. I made out on the dance floor. Public display was my game and everyone saw how I consumed his lips and thrust my pelvis everytime he squeezed my butt.

It was a wild chase born out of spite and it ends up with me sleeping over at the host's place.

My doubts were refuted. Mister Biceps got his wish.

I left the boy's place - deliberately avoiding to get his number - at past 10 in the morning.