Wednesday, March 31, 2010

The Longest Sleep | A Retrograde Post

April 1, 2010

The last thing I remember was asking Curiouscat in a text message about the people he is with. It was past Nine in the evening. I was already lying comfortably in bed and just waiting for the last of my synapses to shut down. I had a very long day. Went to work at 4 in the morning after realizing I couldn't sleep. Dami kong iniisip about work lately, especially now that I'm doing an analysis of our agents' performance. After work, I had to re-read RedtheMod's revision. Final submission ng paper para sa Masters and being the true maestro, I don't feel confident sending my essays without his approval. When I felt certain that my pieces were ready to be graded, I sent it through email but a hard copy was required as well. So yun, after putting all my earnings at Banco De Oro and then paying the cable bill sa Skycable, off I went to Diliman to pass my essays - in printed form. Eh sarado na yung office ng Creative Writing Department and I don't have the luxury to return next week para mag-submit ng paper. So I thought, dropping by Dr. Dalisay's place to hand over my requirement to one of his assistants would be next thing to do. Buti na lang a classmate showed up and simple lang ang ginawa niya. She slid her paper under the door of the professor's office and then left. Ang presko niya. So yun rin ang ginawa ko. Going home to get some badly needed sleep was the most reasonable thing to do. Pero dahil nagiging prominent ako dun sa isang workout thread sa Pinoyexchange at dahil mas mga adik sakin yung ibang nagpopost dun, I am motivated to work out kahit ikauubos ko ng lakas yung buhat na gagawin ko. Pero bago muna yun, I treated myself at Kowloon House near Kalayaan Avenue to celebrate my achievement. Simpleng Jumbo Pao lang at solb na ako. I felt so stuffed after that I vowed never to return for a while. Sana pala nag-fried chicken na lang ako sa Ministop para medyo bitin. Lol. Since puyat talaga ako at yung mga nap ko the whole day were so light, the lack of sleep affected my performance. Twice yata akong muntikan mag black out pero okay lang, adik talaga eh. Workout turned out fine, and I was supposed to go home. Pero naalala ko kasi yung sabi ni Red na online pa rin daw ako sa MSN after arriving home from work. Since the office is just a 20-minute walk from the gym, I decided to drop by to check if someone had forgotten to turn off the computer. Wala naman pala, paranoid lang ako. Anyhow, I had to stay a little longer to console a colleague who found out that her ex-lover (and the father of her kid) is still alive. She told me her story and the sacrifices she did for her ex Belgian boyfriend. Kesyo siya daw ang nagsupport at nagbigay ng lodging after the guy left his country tapos ang isusukli lang pala eh mangbubuntis ng isang katulong. She said she feels bad not to receive any support for their son when he works in IBM while she works in a less pay-rewarding company like ours. The colleague mulled over the fact that he probably gets thrice the salary there compared to what she's getting now. I could only listen and tell her that she still enjoys a better life: That the guy is a looser for abandoning her after everything she did. The colleague felt relieved. Pero dahil uso pa rin yung Ghost Stories sa office, she asked me to accompany her back to the Floor. Nasabi ko na lang, "ang laki laki mong babae tapos titibo-tibo ka pa pero duwag ka rin pala!" Tumawa lang siya. I let an hour pass before I finally decided to retire to bed. In between the limbo of deep slumber and the fading wakefulness, I was still thinking of inviting someone for a sleepover. Utol was away and my mom - probably wouldn't mind if I ask another guy to keep us company.

The deja-vu guy has returned.

Pero it's Lenten Week nga pala and as they say, bawal ang karne.


I left the bed to eat lunch at past noon the following day.

1 comment:

red the mod said...

My sacrifice this lent would be coffee. And come next week, I hope to enroll at a gym near the apartment. If my pecuniary means affords it. Change must happen, or I'll make it happen.

I need a distraction, a productive and oblivious one. Something I can focus on to remove the blandness of my days. The more things I have to do, the less time I have to think.

Some days, I wish I could just stop thinking. And feeling.