Tuesday, November 20, 2007

Pink Heart (Epilogue)

"I stumbled upon this blog and I was surprised.........

thank you thank you thank you for the kind words.

we just had our outreach for 2007 last November 17 at the Chapel of Hope, St. John Ma. Vianney Parish, Guadalupe, Makati.

I promise you, we will be relentless in fulfilling at least one outreach per year. Together with Divas and Berkey, we shall pursue this despite whatever we hear from people. Ours is not because we wanted to be photographed or publicized. We are way past that stage. We will continue on doing so because we believe that it is the right thing to do, despite our lifestyle.

And you are correct. It was a heart warming experience, not for me, but for all of us.

thank you thank you thank you..

I hope you get to visit us once in a while...."

- Rotogold


---

An act of kindness will be discovered, no matter how one tries to keep it a secret.

It was a balmy afternoon almost two years ago when the activity was set forth. I came from work and I had to trudge my way to Tayuman to bring the two cartons of infant's milk that I promised for my contribution. They organized an outreach program for orphans and at the helm of this massive effort were some very good-hearted homosexuals from the website guys4men (G4M).

The summer was about to end and joining them was not initially part of my plans. I do not even belong either to one of their umbrella groups. However, it just so happened that when I decided to stalk their threads, a guy posted a message and it convinced me to volunteer despite the risk of outing myself to a very large community.

"Pwede ko ba bigyan ng saysay ang buhay ko at sumali dito?" was the guy's posted message.

It was a mere one-liner but it moved me to support the effort unrestrictedly. For all the sex parties, sex eye balls, grand eye balls, threesomes and orgy invitations posted in g4m daily, rarely do homosexuals get organized for such a humanitarian effort like the one headed by Rotogold and Divas.

My chance to finally justify my existence as a homosexual was laid down to me.

All I have to do is grab the opportunity and be proud of what I have done.

---

Spending a late afternoon with orphans was a moving experience.

The kids were mostly abandoned because of their birth deformities, or their parents simply surrendered them out of extreme poverty. They have their own tiny sheltered world run by nuns lead by the late Mother Teresa herself. First impressions would tell that they are well sustained by the foundation that runs the orphanage. However, unlike the bigger institutions, they receive less attention and visitors from the outside world.

It seems like our contingent was the first to visit that summer.

Two years after it all happened, the scenes inside the children's quarters remain vividly imprinted in my thoughts:

Little toddlers limping towards the visitors, our presence, like a break to the endless monotony they have to live every day; Babies who could not even cry because of the large tubes inserted in their mouths; the only response to the affection you show them is a tight grip at your pinky finger, as if asking you not to leave; A teenager girl who sat in a wheelchair. Her thought process can be compared to those of a twelve-year old, trying to retell you her ongoing sad story that the nuns and volunteer caregivers have heard a million times over; Children's beds being shared by two or three babies, wishing to be carried around but their uncontrollably salivating mouths or bulging eyes discouraged you from doing so because of their fragility.

What's so sad about their fate is that they will have to live such existence for the rest of their lives. With such disadvantages, nobody would most likely adopt them. They are one of the most unwanted children alive.

That summer, I learned a little lesson about the value of affection. In the long course of time, that summer went on to become the most meaningful I had in recent years.

What I find very strange is that after the two-part entry was buried in heaps of other posts, it was suddenly and surprisingly found by one of the organizers of the outreach program.

- Exactly at a time when a new generation of PLUs from another world not connected with G4M decided to follow their lead and organize the same kind of outreach program for orphans.

There must be a universal connection between the cross-worlds.

Kindness is indeed, contagious.

---

Despite the festive mood I saw while being there, I still wondered how it would look like if it was a mere ordinary day for them? Would they still feel perky and excited? Would Anna still try to unleash the inner raging diva in her and sing in front of everyone? One thing is sure though, and I felt it whenever I was left alone while looking at the eyes of the children who lives in that orphanage; the place may perhaps be the only home to these kids, but underneath the veil of care and attention given to them by the nuns and their trusted assistants, it still remains a desolate and lonely place to stay.

I wonder how it feels like growing up without experiencing being hugged?

- Pink Heart (Ending)

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